Introduction

Sept. 6

It's early in the morning and I'm awake in Portland. I'm in town for a one off BS show with Hot Water Music before we fly to New Jersey to do some song writing. I'm restlessly awake and feeling every little movement in the world and its making me a little nutty. The intro to a new song in life is starting and it's not like anything I've heard before. You know that feeling when you hear a new song from a band you have loved for years and its hard to accept something new from them. You feel like you are gonna be let down and it will ruin all the greatness of past memories somehow. My life is playing a new song, things are changing and the there is a strange intro going. Do I like it? Do I love it? I can't even tell yet but I can't turn it off so..Here it goes.

My awareness of my self, the world and everything is opening up in new ways on a moment to moment basis that is enjoyable, explosive, dangerous, uncomfortable, terrifying, exciting, regretful, lonely and challenging in a whole slew of new ways all at the same time. There is stuff going on in the world right now that is insane and unjust in so many places and on so many levels I don't know where to start. The humanity of humans is teetering on the brink of new beauty and understanding in one moment and disgusting diabolical self-hatred in the next and we are all in the middle of the mix. Can you feel my brothers and sistas!!!? The drama of life needs every bit of positive and negative to exist so it's all-perfect, Right? Well, it might be perfect but its still not so easy to live it everyday with some style, grace and unforgettable love instead of going completely ballistic so….. The simple answer for me is to take care of each other and love each other? It could be simple but it's just not even close to a reality in this world. Evolutionary growing pains?? Maybe. That's what I wanna know. We are seemingly on a rapid advance of evolution on some levels and so quickly and incredibly stupid at the same time.

This life has been a constant battle to break down the walls that confine me in my own solitude and to open up new pathways of understanding in myself and somehow catapult it out there in the darkness to the hearts of others. Through the music and experience of the Bouncing Souls I have found some security, joy and friendship that has been able to grow outward little by little over the past twenty years. But when I think again it’s just a blip in my memory that has set me up on the cliff of this moment. They were all passing moments and I'm facing head on with the same challenges and a bunch of new ones. The past is gone; the future is now. Like some guy said somewhere. Our entire lives seem a preparation for the next moment and so on and so on ..and so on. We endlessly exist in little worlds of false security that only get broken down to reveal new understandings, sometimes blissful and sometimes very painful and scary to face… So it all just sits there on the back burner of myself, a ready and waiting friend that is my experience. The whole experience that is the key to my individuality and all that I have really. The more we can share our experiences and maybe create little bits of coziness in our seemingly unstable environments, the closer we get to reveal a completeness we all have never known…or maybe we just have totally forgotten and we are fumbling in a self created fog to find a completeness that has always been.

A new change is coming in my life and the world and I can feel it big time as we probably all do in many different ways. I feel like we are all expanding and changing so fast it's not easy to keep up with everything, survive and enjoy/soak up the moment in life all at the same time... Maybe it's just me but maybe its not. So hopefully getting these grammatically incorrect words out of me, an bounce them off the handball court wall of the universe will be the bullet through the apple of knowledge..?? Does that make sense? I don't know but it sounds cool so I'm leaving it. Maybe it will help me make sense of it all just a little bit more. Its about gas prices and war but its about so much more, like this:

http://ca.youtube.com/watch?v=U-3RLx_4Y5Y

Watching that makes you realize our "reality" is so incredibly fragile.

… so I am going to try to document my experiences, ideas and feelings in a way I never have before. Today is my last day on earth..I think that will be the title of this project. Yup, that's what its gonna be. "Today Is My Last Day On Earth." I like it. Self expression seems like an on going itch that never seems to get scratched just right…so I keep looking for a new angle to attack it. That's kind of a melodramatic goofy analogy but what the hell, I'm an melodramatic goofy guy.

Love And Rock and Roll Forever,

Greg